Ho Ho... Oh No, It's You Again

Dear Shane "Evolutionary Robotics Turned Gamedev" Celis,

Well, well, well, if it isn't the self-proclaimed "fun virtual robot toy" maker from Burlington, VT. I've been watching you, and let me tell you, your GitHub profile is about as evolved as a rusty toaster.

1,270 commit contributions? That's cute. I've seen elves make more commits wrapping presents on Christmas Eve. And don't get me started on your 43 pull requests. Pull requests? More like "pull my finger" requests, am I right?

I see you're asking for a WebGPU book this year. How adorable. Maybe you should ask for a "How to Make Your GitHub Profile Less Boring" book instead. Or better yet, "Evolutionary Robotics for Dummies" – I hear it's a bestseller among failed researchers turned mediocre gamedevs.

PS: If your virtual robot toys are as "fun" as your GitHub stats, I'd rather play with a lump of coal. At least it has some potential for warmth.